Designing and delivering this presentation or that,
or wondering what to cook my family for dinner,
or deciding (sadly) what I'll wear tomorrow,
or schedule-crunching to finish the shopping,
or looking ahead to when I'll wrap the gifts we buy,
or figuring out when I'll prepare all those Christmas cards...
But wait, we have to get our family picture taken first.
Should our outfits coordinate?
It seems everything compounds until the only noise I hear is that of my stressed-out little heart thup, glup, glupping its way to the end of school, and then finally, the holidays.
When my vision of what's really going on in life is impaired...perspective always presents itself. When the waves (almost) crash and the fury is (almost) at fever pitch, an attitude of gratitude seeps in. I stop tonight; quietly contemplative.
Tonight, my cousin paces terrified to imagine the future without his young wife.
Thank Tom for being the man of my dreams.
Tonight, two tiny children snuggle tightly into Mommy to learn everything they can about her...almost as if by osmosis...before it's too late. The unexpected lesson: cancer.
Attend fully to Reid during our short evenings...make every minute count!
Tonight, a family surrounds her silent and watching...believing in a miracle.
Keep praying! The Hands that hold the world also hold Nikki...
Tonight, an older Mommy and Daddy would trade places with the daughter they brought into the world thirty years ago just so she could see her babies grow up.
Parenting is an unselfish act...do I always treat it as such?
My presentations, gifts, shopping, cards, clothes, and menu choices
are insignificant.
And, that's probably being generous.They don't matter in the grand scheme.
Instead of seeing my to-do list as obligatory, I should see it as a list of opportunity.
Opportunity for the family with whom I've been blessed,
for the job which inspires me and keeps me growing,
for the clothes I have to keep me warm,
for the food reserves I can pull from each mealtime,
for the means to gift special people at parties, gatherings, at home around our tree,
for friends' smiling faces on cards I love to receive each holiday season.
You know, sometimes I'm so busy I can hardly see straight; but mostly that's because I'm not focused on opportunity...
Write on,
b
I'm heartbroken and inspired. "The hands that hold the world also hold Nikki..." My prayers are with your family.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful. I have goosebumps. And I want to keep a copy of this. Wowwowwow. I'd love to make my words flip and dance like you.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing,
Ruth
It's just a lesson for us all, to stop and consider what can be, and what might be. You wrote the words with such heart, and I am sorry for your sadness.
ReplyDeleteA powerful post and powerful reminder. Thank you for sharing this. My thoughts are with you and your family
ReplyDelete"...the only noise I hear is that of my stressed-out little heart thup, glup, glupping its way..."
ReplyDeleteThis line is beautiful (as is the rest of your post). I could sense that you were approaching a turning point, but I was not prepared for exactly where you went. Your perspective is sobering. I am sending positive energy in your direction!
Friends...thank you so much for your sincere and kind comments on this slice; they mean the world :).
ReplyDeleteAs a post-script, I am saddened to tell you today that she is gone.
Let's focus on opportunity...
b
Beautiful words, so powerful. I cannot imagine the pain your cousin's family is experiencing. Thank you so much for sharing your words.
ReplyDelete